Your first Black Rose Gateway meeting

So you have finally made up your mind. Whether you are new to the S/M or D/S lifestyle or you are just new to the Washington DC area, you have decided to learn more about the Black Rose.

Congratulations! This is a significant first step in a wonderful journey. The Black Rose Gateway meeting is an excellent venue into the world of the Black Rose and the Washington DC scene. You can learn more about the Gateway meeting by accessing the Black Rose webpage at www.br.org or you can send an E-mail to the Gateway coordinators at This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it . Mitzi and Thomas will be very glad to answer any questions you might have about the Black Rose, the Washington DC scene or the S/M D/S lifestyle in general. These Gateway coordinators are here to help you learn more about our organization and what we do and to make you feel safe and comfortable about the Black Rose.

What to wear at a Gateway meeting?

For many people, “dressing up” in fetish clothing is an important part of their enjoyment of the scene. This is great; however, wearing fetish clothing is inappropriate at the Gateway meeting. The Gateway coordinators will be either in business or casual attire and you should be the same. Many of our Gateway attendees come directly from work.

What to expect in your first Gateway meeting?

The Black Rose hosts their Gateway meetings in the “Hyatt Regency Washington on Capitol Hill” which is located at 400 New Jersey Avenue, NW, Washington, D.C., 20001 Tel: 202 737-1234.

The hotel’s website is http://washingtonregency.hyatt.com/hyatt/hotels/index.jsp

The Black Rose chooses to host their Gateway meeting in a major hotel for the comfort of our attendees. We realize that attending a Gateway meeting is a big step and it is only natural to be a little apprehensive. By holding our Gateway meetings in a major hotel conference room, we hope that our attendees will feel more comfortable.

If you are unfamiliar with Washington, DC, we highly recommend you use the map and directions function on the hotel website as the streets in Washington DC can be confusing and the traffic will be heavy.

The Gateway meetings start at 8:00 pm on the first Thursday of the month. Please give yourself plenty of time for traffic and parking. There is street parking around the hotel but it can fill up pretty fast in the evenings. However, you should be able to find a parking space within 1-2 blocks. If you are new to the Washington DC area, please read all the parking signs as the DC parking laws can be confusing… and expensive! The Hotel has an underground parking garage but parking there will cost between $17.00 (0-3 hours) and $21.00 (3-6 hours).

Once you find a parking spot, please come into the very nice Hyatt Regency hotel. This is a big hotel and you need to find out which conference room the Gateway meeting is being held. Unfortunately, while we usually get the same rooms, we are sometimes moved to other conference rooms depending on the business traffic in the hotel. This is a busy hotel. The hotel has video displays that show which meeting is in which room. However the video displays are awfully slow in showing the many meetings. Truly the best way is to ask for us at the front desk.

The Black Rose insists on doing business in an above board open manner. The organization has nothing to hide. The Hyatt knows exactly what type of organization we are and what we do and they love us! So there is no need to feel self-conscious about walking up to the front desk and asking “where is the Black Rose meeting tonight?” That’s all you have to ask. No need to go into unnecessary details. The front desk personnel will tell you the name of the meeting room. Conference rooms in the Hyatt are not numbered but have a distinctive name (Bryce, Yellowstone, Olympia, etc). When the front desk tells you that the Black Rose is meeting, for example, in Bryce, please ask the person where Bryce is located. The first time you visit the Hyatt Regency, the location of the conference rooms can be a little confusing. The people at the front desk are there to help you find your room.

After a quick visit to the restroom, you will find yourself outside the door to the mysterious Gateway meeting. Don’t run away, we are really a nice bunch of people. We try to have the meeting room door open, if it is not, please open the door, and come in.

As the door creaks open… Well actually it never creaks, the Hyatt takes good care of their hotel; You will meet the two Gateway coordinators. Currently the Gateway meetings are hosted by Mitzi and Thomas. Hopefully all your apprehensions about the meeting will melt away after meeting us.

Mitzi looks like everyone’s favorite aunt and only her friends know that underneath that persona is a wickedly wonderfully kinky lady. Thomas looks like an underpaid and overworked businessman and that is not a persona. The biggest surprise for our new attendees is that the Black Rose is full of people just like you. The Black Rose is full of nice friendly normal people who just happen to be a bit kinky. We have business people, teachers, students, professionals, and just every day people working hard for a living.

Mitzi and Thomas are volunteers. They choose to host the Gateway meetings because they not only have more years in the scene than they like admitting to, but each of them truly wants to bring people into the organization and the lifestyle. Both are past Black Rose board members and have been associated with the Black Rose for over ten years. We hope you will feel comfortable talking with them and please feel free to ask any question you might have concerning the Black Rose, the Washington DC scene, or the S/M D/S lifestyle (especially ask them what S/M and D/S mean if you are not familiar with those initializations!)

In addition to the two Gateway coordinators, the Gateway meeting will consist of a small number of people just like you, interested in either learning more about the Black Rose or more about the lifestyle. We seldom have more than ten people and that’s the way we like it. The Gateway meeting is an intimate setting where everyone can talk and get to know more about each other.

We do ask that each attendee give us their first name only, what state they live in, and how they learned about the Black Rose. We use first names only as the Black Rose treats the privacy of our attendees very seriously. Since this is a friendly intimate meeting, first names are all we need (if you make up a first name, we will never know). We like to know where you are from and how you heard about us. The Black Rose invests in different advertising venues and we like to know which ones are attracting our attendees.

The Gateway meeting runs from 8:00pm to 10:00pm and is pretty evenly split into two sections. The first hour will be an explanation of the Black Rose organization including all the different meetings, classes, and events the Black Rose offers. You will be given a four page handout with all the information that you can take home. One thing the Gateway coordinators will make very clear is that with the exception of two specific meetings, you do not have to be a member of the Black Rose to attend any regular Tuesday meeting, class, demonstration, workshop, SIG, or event. We will be covering the advantages of membership in the Black Rose; however we will not be pushing membership. As a matter of fact, the Gateway coordinators do not even carry membership forms. Gateway is a nice intimate meeting for people to learn more about us, not to be subjected to a membership sales talk.

The second hour is more informal. Mitzi and Thomas will more fully introduce themselves and tell a little about how they came into the scene. We then go around the table and encourage our attendees to introduce themselves and give what ever details they feel comfortable with. If you just want to give your first name and then say nothing; that’s perfectly acceptable. Some people just want to listen and learn. If during this second hour you need to leave to get home to the family, we understand. You are most welcome to leave when you have to, or stay as long as you like.

This is also a time for questions. We often use new and confusing terms when talking about the S/M and D/S scene. If any term in unfamiliar please ask. There truly is no dumb question, and by asking your question, you will be doing the person next to you a favor as they probably had the exact same question.

At 10:00pm the meeting is supposed to end but frequently there is such a good lively discussion we go longer! After the meeting, we offer one additional helpful service. If anyone would like company while walking to their car, please let us know. We do it all the time. Many parts of DC look scary at 10:00pm and if you would feel comfortable with company while walking to you car, please ask. We will be glad to help. Also, if you choose to take the metro to the meeting, we will be glad to drop you off at the nearest metro station. You will find that people in the Black Rose look out after each other.

We look forward to meeting you at one of our Gateway meetings

Mitzi and Thomas